It is painful to watch someone we care for struggle or hurt. It tends to make the person struggling feel as though she cannot share her pain, sadness, or anger. Just like our impulse to fix the pain, we also often believe that the best way to help is to offer advice. But advice is usually not helpful for several reasons. If we offer good advice, our loved one will think that anytime he is struggling, he needs our instruction.

Advice takes away the gift of helping our loved one to realize that she knows herself best, and ultimately she is capable of navigating difficult situations herself.

Though, of course, she will always have our love and support. If you have had a similar experience or believe that you have felt the same way, you can share this with your loved one. Keep your story brief, and make sure the purpose of the story is to let him know that he is not alone. Also, be sure to include that you understand that your experience, while maybe parallel in some ways, is yours , and you are not claiming to have experienced the exact same situation or feelings. This allows him to feel comfort in not being alone, but also gives him space to communicate how his experience may be different.

While it may sound too simple to just reflect what our loved one is saying, it actually makes the person feel heard and understood.

It also offers her the opportunity to hear what she is expressing, and to clarify how she feels or what she wants. Nodding and using eye contact and engaged body language shows that we are interested and open to what our loved one is sharing. It gives him the space to express himself, and makes him feel heard. As much as this hurts, it is okay to feel this way. Sometimes, all our loved ones need when they are in pain is to be heard; to be given a space with someone they trust to express how they are feeling.

Sometimes, however, they may need some extra support or professional help. If you or someone you love might benefit from acceptance and commitment therapy ACT , cognitive behavioral therapy CBT , or biofeedback for anxiety, depression, stress, or PTSD, or if you would like more information about our therapy services, please contact us at or at csamsandiego gmail.

You may have noticed the rapidly increasing pitter-patter of your heart, the fast, constricted breaths, the growing tension in your shoulders and neck, clammy hands, or maybe a funny feeling in the pit of your stomach. The experience of anxiety is unpleasant, to say the least, and as it builds, it certainly has a way of getting our attention. Why do we experience these uncomfortable sensations that we call anxiety?

From an evolutionary perspective, fear and anxiety two related but slightly different emotions have a function: they keep us alive. More specifically, fear and anxiety are emotions that occur in response to a perceived threat. When we believe that something may harm us or is dangerous, we feel these emotions and they motivate us to protect ourselves from the danger, typically either by avoiding or escaping the threat.

Without fear or anxiety, we may not react to truly dangerous situations in an adaptive way, and thus not survive as a species. Imagine walking along and crossing paths with a Grizzly Bear. Would it be helpful to feel no fear, and to run up and hug it? Obviously for most of us, this would not end well! Our emotions give us invaluable information about the environment and about what actions we should take, based on how we feel. As incredible as our brains are, they also are prone to errors.

We are not always able to accurately assess the true amount of danger or safety that may be present in our surroundings. Sometimes this means that we may miss a true threat that was present and suffer the consequences. However, in our modern day society, more often than not we experience the opposite — we overestimate the true amount of threat and thereby experience excessive anxiety as a result.

The problem with excessive anxiety is that it can negatively impact the quality of our lives in multiple ways. Prolonged, pervasive anxiety has an impact on our physical well-being, in addition to our psychological well-being. Chronic stress and anxiety can lead to a deterioration of optimal physical functioning, preventing your immune system, digestive system, and heart from performing the best that they can. How does anxiety become problematic?

Cognitive-behavioral therapists tend to understand most mood and anxiety disorders using the cognitive triad, which breaks down our experiences into thoughts, behaviors, and feelings.

In brief, anxiety is both developed and maintained by an interplay between certain unhelpful thinking and behavioral patterns. For example, anxiety may be perpetuated by certain ways of thinking. A low threshold for perceiving threat i. In other words, if we easily feel threatened and continue to be on the lookout for threat, we will likely frequently feel anxious. Another thinking pattern that feeds anxiety is called catastrophic thinking.

Catastrophic thinking occurs when our mind jumps to imagining worst-case scenarios when we are uncertain about an outcome. When we are feeling anxious, we often feel very certain that the worst-case scenario will occur even though realistically-speaking, the chances are much lower or are little to none that what we fear will actually happen.

Unfortunately, we are unlikely to recognize this while we are in the midst of severe anxiety — instead, we may engage in worry or rumination i. In moderation, worrying and planning for future threats can be helpful, but when it begins to take excessive time and energy which is quite exhausting , it becomes maladaptive and interferes with your ability to function optimally. More often than not, the cost of worrying exceeds the benefits it may become a waste of energy and actually feeds the anxiety that it is intending to placate.

These are just a few ways that our patterns of thinking can create and maintain anxiety. Come Into Our Room Clinic. The Equalizer Clinic. The Chase Clinic. Harmony Clinic. Internal Wrangler Clinic. Saturday 7 August Sunday 8 August Monday 9 August Tuesday 10 August Wednesday 11 August Thursday 12 August Friday 13 August Saturday 14 August Sunday 15 August Monday 16 August Tuesday 17 August Wednesday 18 August Thursday 19 August Friday 20 August Saturday 21 August Sunday 22 August Monday 23 August Tuesday 24 August Wednesday 25 August Thursday 26 August Friday 27 August Saturday 28 August Sunday 29 August Monday 30 August Tuesday 31 August Wednesday 1 September Thursday 2 September Friday 3 September Saturday 4 September Sunday 5 September Monday 6 September Tuesday 7 September Wednesday 8 September Thursday 9 September Friday 10 September Saturday 11 September Sunday 12 September Monday 13 September Tuesday 14 September Wednesday 15 September Thursday 16 September Friday 17 September Saturday 18 September Sunday 19 September Monday 20 September Tuesday 21 September Wednesday 22 September Thursday 23 September Friday 24 September Saturday 25 September Sunday 26 September Monday 27 September Tuesday 28 September Wednesday 29 September Thursday 30 September As a beacon of individuality and bohemianism, Clinic have few equals.

Since their inception, the Liverpudlian quartet have followed a unique set of parameters that has come to define the Clinic sound: a commitment to experimentation, a dedication to the craft of the song, and the rackety release of melodic noise. Referencing H. In a coco nutshell, Clinic have gone funky disco, broadening their sonic palette with the addition of several new gadgets including an electronic acid bass machine, a s cocktail rhythm unit, a Casio digital horn and space drum.

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